Post by: on December 04, 2006, 11:22:13 am
Post by: Cherry_Ripe on December 04, 2006, 11:30:34 am
Not a problem as such but here goes:
I have to buy a £5 secret santa gift for a new guy at work. I know almost nothing about him since he started today. He's fairly short, tanned looking, he's 21 years old tops, and he is originally from Ipswich.
What do I buy him?
Post by: kevvosa on December 04, 2006, 01:49:37 pm
Post by: wjp666 on December 04, 2006, 02:42:16 pm
Post by: loulou on December 04, 2006, 02:53:18 pm
Post by: Forth Bridges on December 04, 2006, 03:12:38 pm
and 35 take 9 hours to do the same job
the Q: is how does it take to fill up the keltes to the give them a tea break every 3 Quater per 2 hourrs!
Post by: on December 04, 2006, 03:21:15 pm
Not a problem as such but here goes:
I have to buy a £5 secret santa gift for a new guy at work. I know almost nothing about him since he started today. He's fairly short, tanned looking, he's 21 years old tops, and he is originally from Ipswich.
What do I buy him?
Cherry, I think you should go for some aftershave, or maybe Lynx.
Post by: on December 04, 2006, 03:22:52 pm
How do I make chocolate at home?
Quite a tricky one, you're best to buy some CDM, melt it down and pour it into moulds. You'll think you're making your own.
Post by: on December 04, 2006, 03:23:31 pm
how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
About 180 grammes
Post by: on December 04, 2006, 03:23:57 pm
Does my bum look big in this?
No, it looks nice and I want to kiss it.
Post by: on December 04, 2006, 03:25:58 pm
If 45 workmen take 6 hours to dig a gas pipe and fill it out,
and 35 take 9 hours to do the same job
the Q: is how does it take to fill up the keltes to the give them a tea break every 3 Quater per 2 hourrs!
It depends on the size of the keltes
Post by: loulou on December 04, 2006, 03:30:43 pm
Post by: on December 04, 2006, 03:42:22 pm
Post by: kevvosa on December 04, 2006, 03:49:09 pm
Post by: goldencup on December 04, 2006, 04:14:55 pm
Post by: wjp666 on December 04, 2006, 04:45:45 pm
Post by: on December 04, 2006, 06:43:44 pm
What is the best way to get rid of tobacco smells?
There are special bottles of scent you can buy from Boots and other outlets specifically for this problem. You leave a few drop in a small dish and it counteracts the smell.
Post by: on December 04, 2006, 06:44:53 pm
How many beans make five?
Five beans and a bean, a bean and half and half a bean.
Post by: loulou on December 04, 2006, 06:45:55 pm
Post by: on December 04, 2006, 06:46:02 pm
every day (bar sunday) a man dressed in blue and riding a bike comes to my door and puts envelopes and such through the hole. it's getting really annoying now. how do i get him to stop?
You need to find out who he's working for and tell them to stop sending them. If it's quite a big company write to the MD and complain in writing.
Post by: Forth Bridges on December 04, 2006, 06:52:33 pm
Post by: loulou on December 04, 2006, 07:00:27 pm
Post by: oldspice on December 04, 2006, 07:22:23 pm
What is the best way to get rid of tobacco smells?
Give up smoking
Post by: smurfboy on December 04, 2006, 07:34:19 pm
Unfortunately other people's smoke clings to your clothes just as much. Roll on July I say.
Post by: kevvosa on December 04, 2006, 08:43:12 pm
Post by: loulou on December 04, 2006, 11:13:59 pm
Post by: kevvosa on December 04, 2006, 11:19:13 pm
Which reminds me has anyone seen that funny advert where the woman says "I can't stand bad odours..." - I think it's for Oust.
Post by: loulou on December 04, 2006, 11:24:19 pm
Post by: kevvosa on December 04, 2006, 11:24:49 pm
Post by: loulou on December 04, 2006, 11:32:53 pm
Post by: smurfboy on December 04, 2006, 11:38:28 pm
Dear Bounty,
I manufacture an air freshener which apparently nobody likes. People mutter words like 'musty' when I'm walking around Finefare. How do I save my career? And my sanity?
Post by: loulou on December 04, 2006, 11:40:47 pm
Dear bounty, I am very irritable, having hot flushes and feel the need to stab someone. What is wrong with me?
Post by: smurfboy on December 04, 2006, 11:55:37 pm
Post by: on December 05, 2006, 07:36:03 am
Dear Bounty,
I manufacture an air freshener which apparently nobody likes. People mutter words like 'musty' when I'm walking around Finefare. How do I save my career? And my sanity?
I think you really need a change of career. Try making novelty ice cream cones. Also you shouldn't worry too much about your sanity, it's a mad, mad world.
Post by: on December 05, 2006, 07:37:44 am
Dear bounty, I am very irritable, having hot flushes and feel the need to stab someone. What is wrong with me?
You have the classic symptoms of menopause. Try evening primrose oil and/or meditation. You should be OK by the age of 60.
Post by: loulou on December 05, 2006, 09:09:27 am
Post by: goldencup on December 06, 2006, 04:46:27 pm
Quote from: goldencupHow many beans make five?Five beans and a bean, a bean and half and half a bean.
That makes eight....
The correct answer is two beans, a bean and a half, half a bean and a bean.