Author Topic: Jokes - Good, Bad and Rude  (Read 2839 times)

Offline smurfboy

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« on: July 26, 2005, 06:15:36 pm »
A man walks into a complaints department. He says 'my wife is a slut'.
Who needs karma when you know you're great already?

Offline oldspice

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« Reply #1 on: July 27, 2005, 07:01:42 pm »
Old but spicey!

Offline smurfboy

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« Reply #2 on: July 28, 2005, 10:44:36 am »
Well wouldn't you complain about that?
Who needs karma when you know you're great already?

Offline oldspice

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« Reply #3 on: July 28, 2005, 03:34:27 pm »
Old but spicey!

Offline loulou

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« Reply #4 on: July 29, 2005, 01:27:24 am »

Quote from: smurfboy
A man walks into a complaints department. He says 'my wife is a slut'.


Don't tell everyone or they will all want one.

A power-crazy bitch who lives in a fantasy world

Offline wjp666

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« Reply #5 on: July 30, 2005, 10:34:43 pm »

APOLOGIES FIRSTHAND BEFORE I CONTINUE...


two arabs walk into a clothing store. one picks up a rucksack and tries it on. he turns to his mate and says: "does my bomb look big in this?"


LIKE I SAID, APOLOGIES...

I reject your reality and substitute my own.

Offline oldspice

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« Reply #6 on: July 30, 2005, 10:41:07 pm »
 
Old but spicey!

Offline wjp666

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« Reply #7 on: July 31, 2005, 03:43:52 am »

STICKING WITH THE POOR TASTE, I'M SURE YOU'VE ALL HEARD THIS ONE BY NOW (I'VE HAD THIS ONE TEXT TO ME ABOUT 20 TIMES SO FAR):


apparently osama bin laden is a 100% official chocoholic! yup - tis true. especially smarties...... the other week, he got through 3 tubes... and then finished off with a double decker.


(YES, I AM GOING TO HELL FOR THIS.)

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Offline goldencup

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« Reply #8 on: July 31, 2005, 09:06:23 am »

I kept receiving an even worse one, which I think is seriously sick - What's the difference between London commuters and Smarties?  Smarties don't melt in the tube.


 

Cantankerous Old Crone

Offline goldencup

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« Reply #9 on: July 31, 2005, 09:58:22 am »

I don't know why I even posted that one as it's so bad - once again, I wish we could edit our own posts.


The other one I've receiving is:


Beauty parlours up and down the country are worried about a loss of income now that the Metropolitan Police are doing Brazilians for nothing.

Cantankerous Old Crone

Offline wjp666

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« Reply #10 on: July 31, 2005, 05:12:37 pm »

sick? twisted? yup - but we'd be lying if things like this it don provoke a dastardly smile once every now and again (such as the brazilian one above.) its the ones with ZERO thought gone into them that annoy me... i had one on my phone last week which read, quite word for word: WHY DO IRAQI'S TRAVEL ON BUSES IN LONDON? A./ WHO CARES, BANG, YOUR DEAD!!!! i'm sure you'll agree: hilarious.


yes, its that sorta thing that offends me. if youre gonna pick on sick, twisted subject matter, at least have the dignity to make it worthwhile. lack of imagination is the worst in low-low taste. happens every 'disaster' though... oh well.

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« Reply #11 on: July 31, 2005, 09:40:39 pm »

Can anyone think of a funny joke about murdering children? 


Offline wjp666

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« Reply #12 on: July 31, 2005, 11:15:56 pm »
give me a few mins.....
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Offline maggiemay

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« Reply #13 on: July 31, 2005, 11:24:00 pm »
I know its truly wicked but 'does my bomb look big in this' did make me smile.

Offline wjp666

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« Reply #14 on: August 01, 2005, 12:26:45 am »

bounty - i searched the net after your request, and this is the best it had to offer.


Q: Whats the quickest way from Glasgow to Edinburgh?
A: Just shoot through Dunblane!


funny? no, not really. but hey... do i get a point???

I reject your reality and substitute my own.